It’s All About You

What’s beautiful about relationships is the way they take you to the next level in yourself. Those of us on the road to self-realization and self-actualization often become experts at managing ourselves. We get to a point where we know our idiosyncracies–what bugs us, how we like our environment to be, where we are at in any given moment, when and how to move in response to stress so that we continue to feel balanced. We get really good at flying solo.

And as with all things, we want more (whether we know we’re asking or not) and the universe wants and creates more for us. Relationship, and especially intimate relationship, is your ticket to the next level of mastering your life. Whether you are engaged in the beginning, middle, or ending of a relationship, whether you are in the midst of cultivation, negotiation, or hospice work in relationship, the gifts are of, about, and for yourself. That is the magic and the mayhem of bringing your whole self to bear with someone else. It’s all about you from start to finish. She or he is there to help you see yourself better, no matter the awareness or intention of their participation in the process. And though most of us lose our way and focus in some form, blaming and looking outside ourselves at the other person’s faults and challenges, the purpose of relationship truly is to discover and transform what’s inside us.

All this is not to say that the other person is irrelevant, or merely an object to your subject. Rather, it is my opinion that there are layers and perspectives and flavors of ourselves that we can only know as part of something greater than ourselves. And relationships are often the most immediate and provoking experiences you can have to feel ever deeper the truth and light within you.